Five Stages of Grief
by number1brawlfan
Summary: Five members of the Batfamily experience/represent the five stages of grief in regards to Dick's amnesia in Rebirth.
1. Denial

**This is one of several little experiments I will be working with. I thought it'd be interesting to toy with Dick's amnesia in Rebirth (for those of you who don't know, he got shot, lost his memory, is going by Ric, and isn't really Nightwing as of right now in the comics, which I think could change back whenever they decided to (hopefully soon)). And basically, I thought I'd have one member of the Batfamily represent/express one of the five stages of grief (denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance).**

* * *

The news of Dick getting shot spread like wildfire, hitting nets in his vigilante and social life in one shockwave. Friends swarmed the Wayne estate to see if he was okay. With the prognosis, Alfred had to keep them out of the room, to avoid overwhelm the acrobat. It puzzled them, causing them to wonder what was so bad about several of them being in the room at once. That left Bruce in charge of deliver the bad news.

If Dick's injury wasn't concerning enough, the memory loss only made it worse. No one expected to be a head injury resulting in amnesia, thinking it was a chest or leg wound. Bruce explained the situation as delicately as possible. Dick's memory was faulty, being given memories in chunks. Bruce promised to reintroduce everyone in spurts.

Everyone was able to rationalize the situation, understanding the need for a slow process. They were all hopeful that Dick's memory would come back. However, there was one person who couldn't fully grasp the situation. Barbara. She was one of the first people to learn about Dick's situation and one of the few that got to see him.

Barbara was floored when she saw him. She couldn't believe the condition he was in. She couldn't fathom that he lost his memory. It was made worse when it seemed that he didn't remember the extent of their relationship. His lack of memory towards his adopted family was saved by Bruce and Alfred, but there was nothing that tied his memories to his and Barbara's relationship. Both platonically and romantically.

After a week, she stopped coming by all together, wanting to sort everything out. Her mind and emotions needed time. At least that's what she told herself. Deep down though, she knew she had to get some distance.

Bruce would be the one to seek her out. With Cass and Stephanie busy with other thing as they sorted their thoughts on the situation, Dick with no memory, and Dinah in Star City, he knew he was the best person to talk to her. He would find her while on patrol, sitting on the edge of the Gotham Public Library's roof. She didn't vocally greet him, but she allowed him to join her.

"How are you taking it?" Batman asked.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Batgirl replied.

She could feel Batman's glare burning in her. He clearly wasn't buying it, and she knew he wouldn't if she tried again. Lying to him of all people was an obvious mistake. Batgirl let out a deflated sigh.

"He didn't lose his memory." Batgirl denied. "He couldn't have. He's taken worse hit to that thick skull of his."

"I know it's hard to accept, but that's the truth." Batman reminded, knowing that it was a hard pill to swallow.

Batgirl anxiously shook her head, causing strains of hair to negatively dance. She refused to accept Batman's explanation. It sounded so wrong. So unreal. Like it wasn't even conceivable.

"It can't be true." Batgirl refused. "I don't believe it."

She stood up, turning to Batman. She was wide eyed and skeptical and her frame was nervously shaking ever so slightly. Her mind was playing with multiple scenarios to try and explain the situation. Each one as convoluted as the next.

"He's just acting." Batgirl tried to rationalize. "Pretending like he doesn't remember so that I'll say that I care. That I love him."

"Barbara." Batman sighed. "You two are too good of friends for him to even think about doing that. You know he would never try to spite you like that."

"Do I?" Batgirl scoffed. "You and I both know he's always been such a jokester. Maybe that's all this is. A joke."

Batman approached the redhead, noting her escalating distress. As his hand rested on her shoulder, it all started to settle in. Tears began to streak down her face as she finally came to a realization.

"It's not fair." Batgirl cried, hugging Batman. "He didn't deserve this."

Batgirl's shaking only got worse as she sobbed. Batman knew this was difficult for her. One of her closest friends was lost. He wrapped his arms around her in an attempt to comfort her. It did stop her shaking, but it didn't stop the tears.

"I know." Batman whispered, patting her head. "It's not fair and you're right. He didn't deserve this. But that doesn't mean we can just act like this isn't real."

"But what if he never remembers? What if he doesn't want to remember?"

Those were reasonable questions. This amnesia was unpredictable and there was no foreseeing what could happen. And Batman would be lying if he said he didn't think that those were possible options.

"Then we'll just have to deal with that." Batman stated. "But that doesn't mean we shouldn't stop hoping."

Batgirl tried to hold back a cry, but it let itself out. She wanted to believe him. She wanted to believe that Dick's memory would come back, but she wasn't sure if he would. She lost someone special to her. Romantically involved or not, it still hurt knowing that this happened to someone so close. It just wasn't fair. Not for her, and especially not for him.

A few days later, Barbara began coming back to the manor. She would talk with Dick, getting a feel for where he was at. And while he wasn't exactly the same, wishing to distance himself from Nightwing, there were parts of him that she could feel were still there. He still seemed to care for his family, even if he couldn't grasp the same relationship with them, and he seemed to harbor some fondness for Barbara. Maybe not romantically, but still a sense of caring.

* * *

**Now the reason I had Barbara go with denial instead of depression is for two reasons. One, given all of their time together (romantically and platonically), I feel that she couldn't think of losing all of that history. Two, when I do get to depression, I want it to nbe a mix of depression on Dick's part and the character involved. **

**This fic won't have a set schedule. Mostly because I will be focusing on my main projects and will be a little more flexible with these "experimental" pieces. I plan on doing something looking into Roy Harper's familial connection with Vandal Savage (yes, they're related) in the Arrowverse and flat out DC. I may also go back and rework with old fic. As well as whatever Cass topic wins in my poll (it's currently tied).**


	2. Anger

**I apologize now if this chapter didn't come out too good. I was trying to get a perspective from Bruce and have him have a moment of angered weakness.**

* * *

Ever since Dick was incapacitated, Bruce began getting more agitated and more defensive. He kept such a close eye on Dick, who was now insisting on being called Ric, that he started getting increasingly hostile. Ric would constantly sneak out and get into troubling situations. And when he returned, Ric would act like nothing happened. Bruce was having a hard time controlling him. He couldn't even stop him.

All he wanted to do was protect Dick. Since the shooting, Bruce felt increasingly guilty about it. Having seen it unfold right in front of him, Bruce was traumatized to say the least. Seeing Dick lying on a bed while Alfred treated the wound was worse. But not nearly as bad as the memory loss.

When he woke up with no memory of anything over the last decade or so. Robin. Nightwing. His family. Everything was nothing but a nonexistent blur. The only thing tying Dick to the manor was Bruce and Alfred. He could remember them taking him in after his parents' death. He remembered Bruce's absences, but could also remember Bruce being caring. Though the memory of Bruce being Batman was one of the first things that had to be mentioned, since he woke up in the cave.

That hurt Bruce. The fact that the only memories Dick had was him being a kind yet somewhat neglectful parent. Even with the explanation of him being Batman and initially doing that to find the man who killed Dick's parents.

All Bruce could do was fill Dick in on everything, and even then, it wasn't the same. As a parent, it hurt knowing that years of love and memories were gone. But sorrow wasn't the only emotion to plague Bruce. Anger as well, and it showed.

When on patrol, Batman was aggressively obsessed with finding who did this to Dick. And when he did, there was nothing that was going to stop him from beating the man. Not even Gordon could talk him out of it. And every other villain became fodder, getting beaten to a pulp. At the end of the day, they weren't his target.

KGBeast was the one responsible for this. He was the one who made this happen. He was the one who hurt his son. He was responsible for Dick's amnesia. Batman was going to find him and he would punish him.

It didn't take long for him to get a lead. Several nights of investigating and obsessing proved viable when put together. KGBeast was in Gotham, and Batman would can the whole city if that's what it took to find him. He even left Damian behind to assist Dick if need be so that he could deal with the sharp shooter.

Finding KGBeast wasn't too hard once Batman focused. And when he did find him, Batman stealthily creeped up on the sniper. When Batman was caught, he was quick to dodge every bullet and quickly uppercut KGBeast.

Punches began assaulting KGBeast as Batman released his rage. He didn't give KGBeast the chance to defend himself. When KGBeast did get a hit on, it was countered with an even harder one.

It got to the point where KGBeast lost consciousness, but Batman continued to beat him. He didn't care if he was unconscious. He didn't care how much he bleed. All Batman cared about was getting justice for Dick. With his attacker, who had intended to kill Dick, right in front of him, Batman felt a sense of burning euphoria with every punch.

"Batman stop." Superman loudly ordered as he landed beside him, keeping enough composure not to call the vigilante by name.

Batman ignored him, too caught up in his intent. Superman grabbed Batman's arm and pulled him off of the unconscious sharp shooter. Batman aggressively glared at the Kryptonian.

"Let me go." Batman gruffly ordered.

Superman refused to listen to him. He wasn't intimidated by Batman's glare or his aggressive stance. He knew exactly what this was about, and refused to believe that Batman was thinking clearly.

"Look, I get it." Superman stated. "He shot Dick, but killing him will do nothing. It won't bring his memory back."

Batman glanced at the body and back to Superman. And after taking a moment to calm down, he realized the Kryptonian had a point. It wouldn't bring Dick's memories back. It wouldn't change a damned thing. And as much as he hated it, Batman knew he had to accept that.

Superman released him when he notice that the vigilante calmed down. He was, however, ready to act if Batman charged. When that didn't happen, Superman was relieved.

"I'm sorry." Batman apologized, regretting that he had slipped up so hard.

"It's okay." Superman accepted. "Honestly, I can't say I blame you. Dick's a good kid. However, we have to have a level head with this."

"Agreed."

When Bruce returned home, he quietly checked on everyone. Alfred retired for the night. Damian was asleep with Titus resting at his bedside. All the while Tim was finishing up a project for school.

As he checked on Dick, Bruce found that he too had fallen asleep. He was curled up in bed and seemed peaceful. What surprised Bruce was what he saw on the bed. A worn elephant plush that Bruce had gotten for him a month after taking in was resting in the corner. Dick must have found it and decided to rehouse it since it had been put away for years.

It brought a nostalgic smile to Bruce's face. Even with the memory loss, it seemed that Dick still harbored his inner child. It was a small gesture that filled him with hope. That maybe everything wasn't lost.

* * *

**The next chapter will hopefully be a little better. It's bargaining, has Damian, and will be a tad angsty.**


	3. Bargaining

**I thought that Damian would be the best for bargaining. Anger could be another, but this works. Plus, if I recall correctly, I came across a panel where Damian is talking about Dick's amnesia and possibly something to do with the Lazarus Pit (feel free to correct me), which inspired the first part of this chapter.**

* * *

Ever since the amnesia set in, Damian refused to leave it alone. He didn't want to leave Dick in such a troublesome state of mind with the odd life choices he had decided to take. It felt so wrong to have Dick acting this way with no memory of their time together. Dick remembered none of their time together as Batman and Robin. He didn't remember their chaotic and respectful bond. Dick remembered nothing about Damian. It was like he was a whole different person.

Damian was determined to find a way to cure it. Showing him tokens and photos of their time together did nothing. Taking him to different places they patrolled and spinning tales of the cases provided very little. Damian didn't want to cause a hard enough blow to the head in an attempt to reverse it. He didn't think he was that desperate. Not that he wanted to intentionally hurt Dick in an attempt to get a response. There was only one other logical thing that Damian could think of, but dealing with his father was the wall he found himself facing.

"But the Lazarus Pit can cure his amnesia." Damian argued.

"That may be, but that poses a risk that I'd rather not take." Bruce stated. "It may cure his amnesia, but what will that do for his psyche? It drove Jason mad for a period of time. Do you really think Dick won't react the same?"

"There's a chance that he won't go mad. I would be there. I will make sure nothing happens."

"No. I can't take that chance."

Damian scoffed. He hated how stubborn his father was being. Damian knew he may not be on the best terms with his maternal grandfather, but he knew an opportunity was out there. And even if Bruce said no now, that wasn't going to stop Damian until he got his way.

"I'll stop tormenting Drake." Damian offered, prompting a puzzled glare from his father. "I'll give you back the antique blade I borrowed. I'll do all the cleaning for Pennyworth for a month."

It didn't take long for Bruce to realize what his son was doing. He was trying to talk his way into getting him to agree to let him do this. Bruce approached Damian, placing a hand on the boy's shoulder. It's stopped all of Damian's offered promises.

"I'm sorry Damian, but we're not going to dip him in the Lazarus Pit." Bruce gloomily denied. "I know it can do many things, but we have to think about Dick and what that would do to him, mentally and physically." Bruce sighed. "I know it's hard, but we have to let this sort itself out."

"But what if he doesn't remember anything?" Damian asked, a small amount of dread setting in.

"Then we make new memories and reestablish relationships with him. That's all we can do."

* * *

Once a comfortable, convenient, and safe apartment opened up for Dick, Damian spent several days a week over there. He was still hopeful that a memory would spark, and maybe being away from the manor would help. It was a comfortably Saturday afternoon and Damian snuck over to talk to Dick.

"Do you remember anything, Richard?" Damian asked.

"Nothing's really came back." Dick sighed. "I'm sorry."

Damian's relationship with Dick had strained since his amnesia. Part of Dick wanted to remember something, but he was mentally exhausted. He wasn't even sure if he wanted to. He didn't want to remember the trauma.

The fact that he wasn't remembering anything, and questioned if he even wanted to, angered Damian. Dick's reasoning felt like a cop out. Was the trauma really that bad that he didn't want to remember the good?

"You've got to remember something." Damian argued.

"It's not that simple." Dick countered. "If it were that easy, don't you think I'd remember something by now?"

"I'll be more affectionate." Damian promised.

Dick looked at him confused. He wasn't sure where this was coming from. Not that he had the memory of his younger family member's affection to begin with. It was obvious that they had a close bond, but Dick couldn't remember what their interactions were like.

"Yeah." Damian reiterated. "If you remember something right now, I will be more affectionate. I won't even push you away when you feel the need to spontaneously hug me. I'll let you take me out to the arcade more. Regardless of what Father has to say."

Dick sighed in defeat. He knew that Damian wanted there to be a spark. A memory. Something. It hurt to see Damian so desperate for a result. Even without his memory, he could tell that Damian was reaching out in pain.

"I'm sorry." Dick apologized, burying his face in his hands. "I can't just magically remember everything. I know you're hurt, but I can't. I'm sorry."

* * *

Damian was ready to go to bed, but his mind was angering him. It dwelled on Dick's lack of progress. No progress. No epiphany. Not even an active attempt to try to remember. Damian hated it. Because no matter what he did or wanted to do, something or someone would stop him from getting what he wanted.

A lump in his throat began to swell. Damian wanted to deny the emotion, but he couldn't. A hypothetical image of Dick getting shot played in his mind and the effects of it angered him. It wasn't fair. Dick's confused and morbid expression hurt him more.

Hot, angry tears streamed down Damian's face. He was angry about the situation. Angry that he couldn't do anything to make it better. Angry that Dick was suffering, even if he didn't have the memory to know it.

Damian had essentially lost a brother. One of the few people he was closest to. Damian felt useless and lonely. Both of which he hated. He wasn't going to let it go anytime soon, even though he knew he would suppress it. Sleep soon took over, taking all of Damian's regrets with it.

* * *

**I wanted Damian to have this kind of reaction. He, in a sense, lost a brother with this whole amnesia arc.**


	4. Depression

**So I approached this chapter a little differently. While Jason is kind of depressed about what happened, it mostly has to do with something in the past and where their at now. This chapter references back to Red Hood and the Outlaws Annual 1 where Jason, Artemis, and Bizzaro are dealing with a case in a circus setting and Jason calls up Dick to help. It also references something from an issue from Jason's robin run (I think the name of the issue was Black, White and Blue and was issue 400 and something) where Dick gives Jason his number in case he needed to talk to someone other than Batman.**

* * *

Jason hadn't seen Dick much since his injury. Not because he didn't want to, part of him did, but because of the chaos of his and Bruce's chaotic last encounter. Tim was the one who filled him in, which he appreciated, but he did find it odd that Dick was going by Ric because of it.

He finally managed to plan a meet up to just talk with Dick. Because even if he didn't really remember him, Jason needed to talk to him and hear what he had to say. They sat over the edge of one of the roofs of Jason's old safe houses. Jason brought a few beers to lighten the mood and to offer Dick something for coming out here.

"So I hear you're doing your own thing." Jason stated. "No Nightwing. No crime fighting. Just trying to figure things out. That's got to cause some trouble."

"Yeah." Dick confirmed. "I need to figure what I want to do. I want to start over."

It made sense. As much as he secretly missed the old Dick, he understood the need to start over. If his memories didn't come back, he would have to. However, Jason was bothered by the details behind the amnesia. Some of the details were reminiscent of an enjoyable adventure in the past. And a familiar one at that.

"I hear it was because of KGBeast." Jason stated. "Your memory lose that is. It makes me feel bad."

"Why?" Dick asked, confused.

"The last time we worked together, we were at a circus dealing with some assassins. One of them was KGBeast." Jason sighed. "Had I known he would be the one who did this to you, I would have done things differently. Either by not contacting you or dealing with him in a more permanent way."

"This isn't your fault. I'm sure I loved spending the time with you."

They went silent for a moment as they tried to think of another topic. Part of Jason didn't want to admit that he enjoyed the adventure with him that night. The first topic that Jason couldn't help but think of talking about was how Dick was doing at home. He wasn't around enough these days, only seeing Tim on occasion.

"So how's home life?" Jason asked. "Bruce treating you alright?"

Dick's shoulders slumped. Clearly he didn't like the question. That could have mean that things weren't going good or Dick wasn't liking the situation he found himself in.

"Haven't been at the manor in a while." Dick admitted.

"Why not?"

"It's not the same. Bruce didn't want to let me do anything. Barbara's a mess. Damian is so distraught that I don't know how to handle it. I can't take it."

Dick let out a deflated sigh. Just thinking about seemed to drain him. It was a lot for him to have to carry.

"Why won't they just accept that things are different now?" Dick wondered.

"Because even though you don't remember it, they do." Jason admitted. "You may hate how they look at you because of the memories you don't have, but they hate having to look at you knowing they lost something important."

Shuffling distracted Dick's train of thought as Jason pulled something out of his pocket and handed it to him. It was a little odd, but Dick accepted the gift. Unfolding it, it had a phone number written on it. Dick looked at Jason confused.

"What's this?" Dick asked.

"If you ever need someone to talk to, don't be afraid to call." Jason offered. "You did the same for me."

Jason pulled out an old wrinkle piece of paper from inside his jacket. On it was a different phone number. He showed it to Dick, who studied intently.

"You gave this to me when I was Robin." Jason stated. "I never really called you much, but I did appreciate it."

Dick didn't respond. Something in him was touched by the gesture. Tears began to spill from Dick's eyes. Jason noted the shift, a little startled. He wasn't trying to cause that. Just show that he had appreciated a small decision and wanted to repay it.

"Hey, it's okay." Jason tried to comfort as he wrapped an arm around his shoulder.

"No. It's not." Dick sighed. "I just didn't know I had such an impact on so many people's lives. I mean, I know I probably wasn't in your life as much when you were Robin, but even then, it seems that I wanted to be good to you. It's just not fair."

Jason was a little disheartened by Dick's distress. Even if Dick wanted to move on and didn't remember anything, it was at least worth mentioning some of the good things in his past. Jason didn't regret telling Dick about the gesture, but he regret that it hurt him.

"You've always been like that." Jason noted. "You care, and I don't think that'll ever change. Even now, I bet there's still a bit of that mother hen in you. You just need to get your footing first."

Jason sighed, leaning back. It was a statement that may annoy Dick, but it was one that didn't stir a lot of controversy. He knew it was still there, Dick was just being stubborn. It did seem to calm Dick down a little, so that was a plus.

"It'll get better." Jason promised. "And I'll be here if you need an ear."

* * *

**And the next chapter will be the last. This has been a fun little experiment. Now, I am currently working on doing a rewrite/update of Cry for Help, which was a Green Lantern fic dealing with something that happened to Kyle. It's currently on AO3, but I thought I'd mention it. I'm also in the works for a Batman AU.**


	5. Acceptance

**The conclusion to this little experimental fic. Now, from what I know, Dick hasn't gotten his memory back in the comics yet (I hope it does, but as far as I know it hasn't), so I left him in his amnesiac state.**

* * *

Conversations between Dick and Tim were always pleasant. About once a week, Tim invited Dick out for coffee at his regular coffee shop to catchup on how Dick were doing. And while, they were usually to see how Dick was doing, Dick also asked about how Tim was doing. Which Tim gladly filled him in on.

When inquiring about Dick's life, Tim kept it to the basics. Life, love, work, and on occasion, his memory. And when he did ask, it didn't seem like any of his memory had came back. Tim tried not to take offense to it, amnesia was unpredictable, and never pressed further than that. It was what it was and Tim wasn't expecting to change it anytime soon.

It was always an enjoyable time and also gave Tim some insight. Their encounters were purely social and for Dick to have someone to physically talk to when Jason might have been unavailable. Tim didn't want to overstep Dick's boundaries by getting too deep into a topic or memory. But at the same time, he did want to make sure that the eldest Robin was doing okay and wasn't in, or having, trouble.

Dick's life seemed to be going well. He had a job, a house and was still able to take care of himself. Tim was concerned about his drinking on occasion, which he made clear, but other than that, he was glad that Dick was alive and healthy. That was what really mattered at the end of the day.

Brice and Damian were the most concerned about these interactions. Not only because of their own concerns, but because of how Tim was responding to it. He appeared fine, but they couldn't help but wonder if he really was.

He had shown little to no sign of ever grieving for Dick's condition. When it first happened, Tim was sympathetic. There wasn't a doubt that it effected Tim to a degree. However, any sign of sympathy and grief disappeared as quickly as it showed up.

It got to the point that Bruce had to sit Tim down and talk to him about it. Bruce couldn't let his concerns go unanswered any longer. After patrol, he sat Tim down and began to inquire about it. Damian went upstairs for the night, allowing Bruce to handle this on his own like the parent he was.

"Are you okay with Dick's amnesia?" Bruce asked. "I mean really okay with it."

"Yeah." Tim answered. "Why wouldn't I?"

"You've just been friendly and have blown over any sign of grief. I'm worried that you're suppressing how you really feel."

Tim tiredly sighed. Part of him expected this to come up. How he handled the situation was definitely different than everyone else's, but he also hoped that no one would question him about it. Leaning forward, Tim looked at Bruce with a grimace.

"Do you remember when you lost your memory?" Tim asked.

"I mean I don't remember everything about it," Bruce recalled, "amnesia and all, but I do remember not having access to my memory for a bit."

"Well when you lost your memory, we all had to handle it cautiously. With what little you remembered about any of us, we had to gage our interactions properly. Dick wore a disguise, Jason kept his visit brief, and I kept my distance. Damian had to address it differently since he's your biological kid and the only one actively living here." Tim looked at his lap for a moment. "We couldn't do a whole lot because of the potential stress and Alfred wanted to keep it simple, which we respectfully obliged to." Tim recalled how deep in the shadows they had to be during the last few days of Bruce's amnesia. "None of us knew if you'd remember anything or if you even wanted to, so we kind of accepted the amnesia."

Bruce was impressed with the depth that Tim went to when addressing his amnesia. It was definitely presented in a way that made sense and explained how they responded to it. At the same time, Bruce knew there was a reason for this tale, and that it could relate back to Dick. However, he needed Tim to make that connection for him.

"Okay, but what does that have to do with Dick?" Bruce inquired.

"Dick doesn't remember anything." Tim reminded. "I think we can all agree to that. But not only that, he doesn't seem to want to. Though that could just be this Ric persona speaking, but I digress." Tim's hands fell onto his lap. "We have to respect that he doesn't want to and accept that there's a chance he never will. Jason has to a degree and so have I." Tim gazed at Bruce with depressed acceptance. "Sure, I miss the old Dick, who made horrible puns and loved this crazy family to no end, but I have to be realistic. I am talk to him so that he doesn't feel like his family is rejecting his current way of life. I want him to feel normal."

Tim stood up, ready to go to bed. He made his case and knew that Bruce would come to understand it. Tim made his way for the stairs, but not without one last thought.

"We can hope his memory comes back," Tim admitted, "and they could very well come back. However, until then, we have to let Dick live his life and take it one day at a time."

* * *

**Five stages of grief. I left acceptance to Tim since I felt he'd be the one to take this with a little more logic. And if you're wondering why I didn't include Cass, Steph, Duke, and Alfred, I didn't feel that they would be affected as badly (excluding Alfred,who wasn't really in here because I wasn't able to fit him in here in a good way).**


End file.
